fall-out.
2006-05-11 10:20 p.m.
because we might not make it, remember paychecks waiting for us in those offices, coming back, barefoot with the summer's skin upon us, enthroned in copper.defeat again, and i am clinging to the carpet, unmanaging my hands at tangles, these hands, these agile fingers, they make out your figure, make you out in comfort, ask you
long distance
to come home and take me over, take me shuddering and subtle, take me stuck and now unable
to speak, for all the weight that's worn me, i am wearing,
lost children and suicides around me,
a concert of the names i have taken and relinquished, forgiving now those enemies, and fearful
for my own actions, without
this honor, without this tower, without a crest to brace me
what can sustain my breathing? i am drawn
here
long limbed and hardheaded, thick haired and uncertain, capturing the root of my own motives, and i cannot dig another inch
for fear of consequences. i have set these limits, these steadfast calculations, this objective-ism, in keeping myself from judgement, hoping that the gravity that marked me would relinquish, would let me go unnoticed, would heed its way to seasons and leave me blessed, petal breasted, ready to resume those lines i'd trusted.